Because I want to flip you over and eat you out.
Dirty pick up lines so bad (nsfw)
Are you a doctor? Are you the lottery lady on TV? Are you a farmer? It is just like a French kiss, but down under. When I saw you, I lost my tongue. Because I wanna taste you again and again without any sense of shame. Do you need a stud in your life? Excuse me, I am about to go masturbate and needed a name to go with the face. Would you like to try an Australian kiss? Because I have a lot of semen waiting for you.
Learn more about Thought Catalog and our writers on our about. Are you a tortilla? Have you seen one? Because I know some good karma-sutra positions. Can you do telekinesis? I wanna split them and eat all the good stuff in the middle.
Did you grow up on a chicken farm? Let me insert my plug into your socket and we can generate some electricity. Are you a drill sergeant? Am I on an episode of Fixer Upper? I just popped a Viagra. Anyone with a good sense of humor will appreciate them. Your place or mine?
Flirty pick up lines that just might work
Tell you what? Want to fix that?
Because I can sea you lion in my bed tonight. My doctor told me I have a Vitamin D deficiency. The only reason I would kick you out of bed would be to fuck you on the floor. Are you a supermarket sample? I may not be a windshield repairman, but I can still fill your crack in.
Reddit’s dirtiest pick-up lines will make you blush
By January Nelson Updated October 9, Whether the other person laughs aloud or rolls their eyes, you are guaranteed to get a strong reaction from them. They say to spit, but I always prefer swallowing. One of my friends told me girls hate oral, do you wanna help me prove him wrong?
What do you say we go upstairs and work out a remedy? Those clothes would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor. I think my allergies are acting up. How long has it been since your last checkup? Your legs are like an Oreo Cookie. Can I put yours in my mouth?
Wanna go back to my place and save me? Head at my place, tail at yours. Are you a racehorse?
Oh you are? Are you a trampoline? Are you a sprinkler?
Because I know exactly what your pussy needs. Hard to get off, but extremely satisfied once you do. Why pay for a bra when I would gladly hold your boobs up all day for free? My bed. Are you an archaeologist? Do you believe in karma? Just be careful with who you decide to approach at parties.
If you were an elevator, what button would I have to push to get you to go down? I have a big headache. I may not have gotten your virginity, but can I at least have the box it came in? Are you related to Dracula? You may unsubscribe at any time.
Someone vacuum my lap, I think this girl needs a clean place to sit. Let me guess your favorite position: anything that involves my balls bouncing against your ass. If we were both squirrels, would you let me bust a nut in your hole? Because I want to bounce on you.
55 dirty pick-up lines you might want to try
Do you know the difference between my penis and a chicken wing? Roses or daises? Add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and multiply. Do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package.
Dirty pick up lines
They say that kissing is a language of love, so would you mind starting a conversation with me? Now I know what flowers to put on your casket when I murder that pussy.
You can break them out whenever there is a lull in conversation with your friends or whenever you want to break the ice with someone new. Cause I wanna give you the 4th letter of the alphabet. Wanna give it some mouth-to-mouth? Are you a pirate? You should sell hotdogs, because you already know how to make a wiener stand.
Because every time your around my dick swells up. You are so selfish. Because you have my privates standing at attention. Darn, it must be an hour fast. You must be Medusa because you make me rock hard.
Are you a sea lion? I hear the best cure for headaches is sex. And the ones on your face. Because you looked a little thirsty when you were looking at me. Because you just cured my erectile dysfunction. Because you sure know how to raise a cock. Do you know why they call me the cat whisperer? Do you go to church often? Your breasts remind me of Mount Rushmore — my face should be among them. Are you a shark?